The Art of Listening

I love how God knows what we're going to face before we do. At the beginning of the year, God told me, "You are going to happy, because you're obedient." 

This was one of those things that I wrote down, hoping that Jesus knew what He was talking about because I honestly had no idea. At the time I didn't know what new things He was going to teach me. In the past few months, the Lord has tenderly spoke to me, and begun to teach me what it means to be an obedient follower of Jesus who knows His voice. 

Now, by no means do I have that figured out. There's an infinite amount of things I still don't know. But something I do know and am completely certain of, is that God is faithful. Something that Jesus has shown me recently is that, despite our decisions, He will never stop loving us. His pursuit is relentless. How lucky are we. 

A few months ago, I would have told you I wasn't hearing from God. That I didn't know what He was telling me to do. But the funny thing is, looking back, I've never heard from God more in my entire life. I knew exactly what He wanted me to do. But I was too afraid, too safe and too comfortable, to say yes, and trust what He had for me. I was going to do it my way. At the time, I couldn't make sense of anything. Nothing was connecting. I was questioning things I had previously known to be true. There was a persistent war going on in my mind. For me, this was the first sign. I knew I wasn't doing what God wanted. It breaks my heart to say it, but this was the first time in my life that I've been angry at God. I was angry at God, because He was simply trying to protect me. I was angry at God because I didn't understand what He was doing. 

Even though this has resulted in the hardest season of my life so far, I am beyond thankful. I'm not really sure how He did it, but because of His grace and mercy I am able to say that He woke me up. He opened my eyes. He inclined my ears to listen. My reason in sharing this story is not to glorify what I did. This is all about Jesus. This is about how He pursued me, made himself clear and offered me endless grace.

And my hope is, that if you're in a similar situation, you'll recognize that He's doing the exact same thing for you. 

"After he has gathered his own flock, he walks ahead of them, and they follow him because they know his voice. They won't follow a stranger; they will run from him because they don't know his voice." 

- John 10-4

"He learned obedience from the things He suffered." - Hebrews 5:8


Join me, and pray this prayer this week:
Jesus, I'm thankful for your grace. I'm thankful for your relentless call on my life. I'm thankful that you're after me. I pray that I will be inclined to listen to your voice. I pray that you will make yourself clear to me. I want to hear from you, Jesus. You are so good. I want to be obedient. I want to say yes to whatever you're doing, even if I don't understand. Soften my heart. I want to know your voice. I want to know you. I will not follow the voice of another. You have my heart, God. You have my attention. 
Amen. 

Song of the Week:
The Voyage - Amanda Cook  

Compassion vs. Condemnation

"He sees you." 

Without a doubt, this is the truth I cling to the most. There's something so beautiful and mysterious about the fact that He sees ME and that He sees YOU at the same time. It gives me so much peace and comfort that the same Lord who walked the earth, created the universe, and rose from the dead, chooses to know me.

Not only does He see us, but He intimately knows us. But the kicker is, He sees us and knows us whether we want Him to or not.

"You see the depths of my heart, yet you love me the same." That's what I'm here to write about today. I'm not here to point out your sin and tell you you're doing it wrong. Because I'd be crazy if I thought I was doing it right. I'm here to tell you that despite your mistakes, despite your decisions... He sees you and your heart, and He loves you.

"I can never escape from your Spirit. I can never get away from your presence." - Psalms 139:7
Go check out Psalms 139 for further reading!

I think, in moments when we are tempted, we like to separate ourselves from God and the truth we know about Him. At least that's true for me. I don't think about the Lord's presence when I'm talking bad about someone or hanging out with people I shouldn't. I like to think He doesn't see me then. But that's not true. He sees us when we "sit down or stand up... when we travel or when we rest at home," says Psalms 139. We can't escape the presence of the Lord.

I hate to say it, and it's weird to think about, but Jesus is with you when you're in front of that computer screen, or in the car with your boyfriend, or at that party. He's there. But I want you to hear this... not for a second did He look at you with eyes of condemnation. Not for a second did He shake His finger at you with disapproval and say, "You're not good enough," or "I don't love you anymore because you chose to do that." Jesus looks at you with loving eyes and a full heart. Your Father is crazy about you despite your mistakes.

"So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. And because you belong to him, the power of the life-giving Spirit has freed you." - Romans 8:1-2

What a beautiful thing it is that His grace is new every morning. He never runs out of love. You are not bound to any chains or any guilt. But Jesus calls us to repent of our sins. My bible defines repentance as a turning away from sin, disobedience, or rebellion and a turning back to God. We have to identify our sin, pray in repentance to the Lord, and then turn our backs to that sin and walk away. I definitely don't have that mastered yet, but it's all a process. And it's a process we can't do alone.

Once you realize that the eyes of the Lord see your sin, you won't be as afraid to bring your sin into the light of day. And to me, that's what it's all about. We can't live in the darkness with our sin and try to master it by ourselves. Satan loves to seclude us and make us feel like we're all alone. So we have to do the opposite of that. Bring your sin into the light and talk to someone about it. Once you've laid it before the Lord, go tell someone else. Get someone to hold you accountable. Rip that band-aid off and get a community of people behind you to lead you in repentance. You're not alone. I can almost guarantee someone is struggling with the same thing.

Be encouraged this week that the eyes of the Lord look upon you with infinite love and compassion. You have a good Father who wants to be #1 in your heart and life. You are more than your mistakes. Do not allow Satan to trap or tempt you. You are stronger than those who want to bring you down. Misery loves company. Be intentional and surround yourself with people who are striving to follow the commandments of the Lord. He loves that you're seeking Him. Take heart.

Song of the Week:
Eyes of the Lord- Pas Neos 

University High School: Mission Field

BOLD (adj) 
- fearless before danger, self-assured, confident, prominent 

Summer's over... school's starting...and I'm a Junior. I actually can't believe it. It seems like yesterday I was picking out my colored pencils and puppy folders for 4th grade. Graphing calculators aren't near as fun. Two years down. Two volleyball seasons, two homecomings, two dreadful winters and two incredible, yet short summers.
Two years to go. 

It's scary to think that we're half done. Looking back, it all happened so fast. I honestly don't feel like I took advantage and enjoyed those two years for what they were. I am constantly looking forward to Friday. Which turns into the next weekend, the next season, and the next year. I've been too busy wishing away what's in front of me, because I want what's to come.

I am a junior and University High School is my mission field. That's how I'm choosing to look at it this year. I'm done worrying about changing the world when there's infinite amounts of work to be done, right here in my small high school. There is thick darkness surrounding the hearts and minds of the students in our schools. Something has to be done. I'm praying for revival. Satan tells me it's crazy but in the name of Jesus, it can be done. I'm chasing Jesus, in the hopes that my high school will see a glimpse of Heaven.

Jesus has woken me up lately... we're simply going to miss it. Without realizing it, we're going to look past the confused hearts in the hallway, or the teacher going through a divorce, or the friend struggling with addiction.

We are called to be bold, dangerous and relentless followers of Jesus. Let's make something out of every moment this year. Even rainy Mondays where we want nothing more but to be in bed. There are far too many hearts to be won for Jesus. 

High school is hard. People are scary. Satan wants us to be consumed with worrying about if they'll accept us, or how weird we'll look. We need to start encouraging each other in this intimating challenge. We're louder together. Take heart...
He sees you, He loves you and He's proud of you.
YOU are enough.
You are being pursued by a loving and good father who's placed that fire in your heart you can't get enough of.
Press on.

Ask Jesus to place situations in your path each day for you to tell someone about Him. Be intentional and listen to that small voice telling you to go sit by that boy in the lunch room. If we listen, he'll show up. I promise.


Verses to encourage you: 
"For I fully expect and hope that I will never be ashamed, but that I will continue to be bold for Christ..." - Philippians 1:20 NLT

"And he will stand to lead his flock with the Lord's strength, in the majesty of the name of the Lord his God. Then his people will live there undisturbed, for He will be highly honored around the world. And He will be the source of peace." - Micah 5:4-5 NLT

"The Lord will bring me into the light, and I will see his righteousness." - Micah 7:9 NLT

"Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world." - John 16:33 NLT

Blind Emotion

Goosebumps, tears and that feeling you get when you know He's there. You know what I'm talking about. For me, I experience His presence the most during worship, whether that be in a public setting or when I'm jammin' alone in my car. That's where He impacts me the most. But why is that? Why am I only moved by the Lord when His presence effects me in a physical way? I've lately realized this is a widespread problem among Christians.

When we get caught up in our emotions, we expect Jesus to show up in a physical way. And we tend to get disappointed and discouraged when He doesn't. Satan tells us that Jesus doesn't hear us, doesn't care about us, or that maybe He isn't even real.

We've started basing everything we know about Jesus around when we feel His immediate presence. We live in a culture obsessed with instant gratification. Social media and texting are perfect examples. We never have to wait for anything. If we want it, we get it, but seeking Jesus is different. He calls us to be confident and still at His feet.

"As for me, I look to the Lord for help. I wait confidently for God to save me, and my God will certainly hear me." -Micah 7:7 NLT 

Earlier today when I sat down, before I typed a single word, I asked Jesus what He wanted me to write about. I heard Him say, "emotion." At first, I was confused and shocked that He would give me such a random and simple word. I think the Lord is trying to get us to hear His heart behind this subject. I think He wants us to shut our mouths and open our eyes to His presence all around us. I can only imagine how our blindness hurts. We have a GOOD father, who is eager to talk to us. Try taking a hike through the woods, having a sweet conversation with a new friend, or chasing the sunset. Slow down, and simply admire the beauty all around you. That beauty directly corresponds to His presence and pursuit of your heart. Jesus isn't only there when you get goosebumps.

Yes, we are called to walk through seasons of life where we can't feel Jesus, but we're also called to be devoted. Let's say goodbye to "Jesus highs" and say hello to being earnest and steadfast followers of Jesus even when we can't hear or feel Him. Lets take our emotions out of the equation, because in the end, it's not really even about us.

We're just simply missing it. Jesus has everything to tell us. When our ears are open to listening only when we feel His presence, we barely give Him a chance to speak.

I'm not trying to undermine the fact that, in my opinion, this is one of the hardest things to walk through. I've been there. I've been through seasons of life where I can't hear or feel Him, most of us have. But that's why we need to open up the conversation. That's why we need to walk through it together, as the Church. That's why we need to change our perspective.

"Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you." - James 4:8 NKJV


Song of the week:
Closer Than You Know - Hillsong UNITED

Welcome to the Wilderness

It's been a while since I've written on this blog. I felt the Lord drawing me back here tonight so I've decided I'm going to dedicate time each week to write what I feel like He wants me to write.

wil-der-ness
= an uncultivated, uninhabited, and inhospitable region

What is the wilderness?
For me, it's the seasons of life when I can't seem to hear his voice, prayer seems impossible and the last thing I want to do is pick up my bible. I think the "wilderness" looks different for each person. Maybe it's a place you've never been, maybe it's a place you can't seem to find your way out of. Maybe it's a place where you have to face your sin, your hurt; the deepest places of your heart. Being in the wilderness is scary for us but I don't think it scares Jesus one bit. God isn't afraid of sending us into the wilderness. So why do we fear it?

"I could ask the darkness to hide me and the light around me to become night-- but even in darkness I cannot hide from You. To You the night shines as bright as day. Darkness and light are the same to You."  - Psalm 139:11-12 NLT

The wilderness is where we are tested. In Matthew 4, Jesus was led into the wilderness by the Spirit. There, He was tempted by Satan. As a response to each of Satan's schemes, Jesus remained strong in the Lord, rebuked sin and recited scripture. After 40 days, angels came and took care of Him.

I think we need to model how we behave in our seasons of wilderness after Jesus. He was steadfast, unwavering in the truth. The things we learn in the other seasons of life, serve one of their purposes when we walk into a season of wilderness. When you're tempted to fall into sin, speak scripture over yourself. Seek Him harder, even when you can't hear him.

Be reminded that Jesus doesn't leave us. He doesn't lead us into the wilderness, simply to leave us lost and alone. He is closer than we could ever imagine. Even when we can't feel or hear Him. He is near. 

"You know when I sit down or stand up. You know my thoughts even when I'm far away... You go before me and follow me... I can never escape from your Spirit! I can never get away from your presence!" - Psalm 139:2, 5, 7 NLT

He wants to reveal things to you. He wants to show you how close He is. He wants to open your heart to new things. Let Him. Stop living with clenched fists. Open your eyes to the beautiful things around you, even when you feel lost. The God who is leading you, is a good Father. Trust Him. He will never leave you.

"But then I will win her back once again. I will lead her into the desert and speak tenderly to her there." - Hosea 2:14 NLT

He promises to speak tenderly to you. Like a good and loving father, He will lead you out of the mess you're in. Praise Him through it. You are not alone. He is right there with you. It is in the wilderness that we discover the beautiful and mysterious things of living for Jesus Christ.



Song of the Week:
Even When It Hurts (Praise Song) - Hillsong United

Yes, Jesus, A Little Longer

"Wait... this moment is too sweet. Would you please stay here with me, and love on me a little longer?" 

How dare we say no? The lyrics above are an excerpt of the song "A Little Longer" by Bethel Music. And it's a game changer. Jesus is literally begging us, through the lyrics of this song to stay, rest and wait. If you've forgotten, He is completely infatuated with you.

It is common to get caught up in actions we feel like we have to do, and rules we feel compelled to follow. Yes, I do believe that we are called to follow the Lord's commandments. I feel like we're called to live differently. But, lately, I've been so caught up in what I had to do, opposed to WHO I was doing it for. When Jesus gets lost in the process, I think it's time to take a step back and re-evaluate our hearts.

The Lord has recently shown me the beautiful and boundless freedom that is found in His presence. And that is found through truly knowing that the Lord goes with us. He abides in us. You and Jesus are one. Once you truly believe this, the Lord is no longer a chore, someone we visit on Sundays, or a foreign man we claim to love.

The lyrics of this song are such a life changer for me because it illustrates the struggle in our hearts of feeling chained to the law, and discovering freedom. Let Jesus be a place you go to rest. We don't have to fill our quite time with the Lord with poetic words. He simply wants us. He simply wants you.

Let the lyrics of this song encourage you. You are free! Give Jesus some love by simply sitting in the presence of the Holy Spirit for "this moment is too sweet." :)

"In returning to me and resting in me you shall be saved; in quietness and in confidence shall be your strength." - Isaiah 30:15 (AMP) 


Song of the Week: 
Where the Spirit of the Lord is - Hillsong Worship 

A Jealous God

“The Lord your God is a devouring fire; he is jealous God.”

-Deuteronomy 4:24 (NLT)

As we do life, we will occasionally find ourselves hindered by our jealously. It originates as wanting a toy your childhood friend had, and develops into secretly coveting the boyfriend your best friend has. What exactly does jealousy look like? When you’re jealous of something you lack, what does it change in you? Does it rewire your thoughts? Are you willing to do just about anything to ensure that you get what you’re coveting after? It often consumes us. It’s also something we should fight to flee from. But Deuteronomy identifies God as a “jealous God.” Do we dare to look upon the Lord’s heart and recognize it as a jealous one? What could Jesus be coveting after?

You.

Yes, Jesus covets you.

Your thoughts. Your time. Your entire heart.

Of course, God isn’t jealous for materialistic things like we tend to be—but He is jealous for us. The One who is capable of counting the stars longs for you. Jealousy does the same things to Jesus as it does to each of us. You are all He thinks about and He will stop at nothing to get you to say, “yes.” The Lord isn’t fleeing from His jealousy—we’d be lost without it.

As the week draws to a close and summer arrives, satisfy the Lord’s hunger. Give him your heart and your thoughts. Jesus is a devouring fire. He is capable of consuming us, so allow Him. When you catch Satan sneaking into your mind and feeding you lies, fight back with, “Jesus is jealous for me” because the enemy can’t compete with that.

Use this as your phone background to serve as a daily reminder: 

Song of the week: 

A Little Longer - Bethel Music & Jenn Johnson